Tuesday, June 22, 2010

WebMD Scares Me to Death


Well folks, it has been nice knowing you. I'm on my way out. It appears I may have lupus. It's either that or gout. Sure, WebMD says my knee pain could also be something as simple as tendinitis or a knee strain BUT it could also be sickle cell disease, and once you've put down a serious condition like that, how can you not be scared.


Ok, chances are very good I do not have lupus, or one of the other major problems the symptom checker on WebMD spat out, but how can you not be a little scared about this stuff. One day you wake up with a runny nose and next thing you know, you've got some 19th century disease called Hemostratanoba (note: Hemostratanoba is not a disease from the 19th century disease, in fact, it is not even a disease, or a word for that matter. I made it up cause I am too lazy to look up no longer existent 19th century diseases. Which, actually may have been quicker than writing this lengthy explanation on my made up illness. Damn.)


I wonder if anyone has ever had a heart-attack from seeing a WebMD diagnosis? How ironic would that be!? Well, okay, not ironic in the actual definition sense, but more in the Alanis Morissette, rain on your wedding day sense. I get it, they have to put down every possible problem you could have with your symptoms, but man can it scare you.

1 comment:

agnes forman said...

I always pick up the worst sounding disease from the list just as a let's prepare for the worst case scenario. I have actually been forbidden by friends and co workers from visiting webmd because apparently they feel it makes me a hypocondriac. I don't know about that but last week I convinced myself that my tiredness was in fact fibromyalgia so maybe they have a small point...