Tuesday, November 18, 2008

A Request

Ok, it is evident that one day I will be ridiculously famous. I'm talking Angelina Jolie famous. It is also evident that one day I will die, and when that happens I am sure it will deeply sadden a large portion of planet Earth, except for the people behind www.IHateNewman.com (Note: This website doesn't exist yet, but I am sure it will since people who attain the level of stature that I will, will have their detractors . . . ANOTHER NOTE: It would be awesome if someone wanted to start this site.) When I do die, there is one thing I would like to request: Whatever happens after my death, I DO NOT WANT A HIGHWAY REST-STOP NAMED AFTER ME!

Molly Pitcher, Vince Lombardi,Thomas Alva Edison, these are just a few of the once respected figures who had their names tarnished by highway rest-stops. If someone told Edison while he was working on the lightbulb, that to honor him we would attach his name to a place where people get a burger, go to the bathroom and purchase avaitor sunglasses, we'd probably still be living in the dark.

Please, feel free to stick my name on a football stadium, concert hall, heck, even a car would be fine ("Feel Like a Brand New Man in The Brand New Ford Newman" - gold), but please don't make a Michael George Newman Rest and Service Area. Thank you.


Illuminati said...

In the future there will be no rest stops because there will be no highways. We will all be flying around in our hovercrafts, affectionately known as 'The Newmans.'

Patent Pending.

Toni Ryan said...

although newms, there is one major advantage to having your name associated with a rest-stop. so much perverted nonsense could go on at a rest-stop (bathroom stall) that you'd be guaranteeing your name a place in history (infamy).

Newman said...

I do love perverted nonsense