Friday, February 26, 2010

Don't Blame Mother Nature!

The only thing I am more sick of than the snow is the influx of snow related rants. Guess what: We get it, we all hate the snow!

With that being said, here is a snow related rant:

Ok, but this one has a slightly different message (and fancy graphics!) I have heard a lot of people saying, "That Mother Nature is a B%$*h" or "If Mother Nature was a person I would rip out its heart, put some Tabasco on it and eat it for breakfast!"
First of all, that's gross, who likes Tabasco sauce? Second, your anger is misplaced. You see, Mother Nature is not at fault. Who is you ask? Hollywood.

That's right the jerks in Hollywood are at fault for the problems caused by all this snow. Here, follow this incredibly broken string of logic: In what year were we supposed to have flying cars by? Right, the year 2000. What is the biggest problem with the snow? Driving on land (also would have accepted, "Not as easy to pee in your neighbor's yard.") So, if my reasoning is correct (and it isn't) by now we should have been flying our cars around and would not have had to deal with the slippery conditions on the roadways (Yes, the snow coming down would still be obstructing our vision but that would obviously be taken care of by our laserbeams.)

All the movies Hollywood put out years and years ago about the year 2000 had one theme in common: Flying cars. We all assumed they were coming, I mean when has Hollywood ever lied to us (We'll get you Godzilla - you horrid lizard beast!!) Here's an idea, instead of spending money on making movies with flying cars, we spend that money on actually making flying cars, then we wouldn't have to worry about the snow!


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